The Chainsaw Blues Brothers Return

Some people are so miserable that only a star on the Walk of Fame would cheer them up. And then there is the rest of us, we who get excited about any silly little thing made for us lovingly, for example, a personalized chainsaw! The scene with Elon Musk, wearing sunglasses, receiving a handcrafted chainsaw from Javier Milei, the world’s most rocking president, and howling during the delivery, is the most hard-rock thing I’ve seen in recent history, at least since the beginning of Metallica’s Load. It’s the Blues Brothers’ “Sweet Home Chicago” to my ears.

The chainsaw is beautiful. It was made for Milei by the Argentine artist Tute Di Tella, and it has the Argentine president’s battle cry “Viva la libertad, Carajo!” inscribed on it. Musk raised it for photographers and journalists (I’m talking about the chainsaw), and a large portion of the woke sector hit the deck trembling with fear. Then smiling like a damn lunatic he made as if cutting a hedge, or pruning a pine tree, or cutting down the government budget for buying condoms for terrorists.

If it were only an empty performance it would be just funny, but since it is real, it is also encouraging. Besides, we live in times when public opinion is made up of memes. And I can’t think of a more illustrative meme than the roar of the chainsaw.

Milei and Musk are united above all by madness and a certain social awkwardness. They get along with the masses as well as I do when I sit among engineers and programmers at a wedding. The Argentinian buries his head in economic philosophy, while Musk has fun fantasizing about gadgets that can be launched into space.

One of them entered Twitter’s headquarters with a sink and, indeed, managed to clean all the censorship and wokist filth. The other entered the Kirchnerist whorehouse of the Casa Rosada with a chainsaw and left the Government, which was a jungle, looking like the pitch at the Bombonera stadium.

They make such an extraordinary couple as John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd. Maybe they should start a rock band, creating songs with titles like Blow Up a Useless Federal Agency, I’m in Love with Private Property, My Redheaded Friend Has Four Balls, Viva la Libertad (Carajo!), or I Don’t Give a Sh*t About Your Defects (but pay for them yourself).

Milei has lifted Argentina’s dead economy in record time with a recipe for cutting spending and ending bureaucracy, and Musk is on track to get the United States flying high again, as soon as he finishes cutting loose the ballast left dangling from the various administrations in the far corners of federal spending. USAID, it’s coming for you, too. By the way, progressive journalists should stop illustrating news about USAID with pictures of African children living in squalor and start illustrating their reports with a condom on the head of a Hamas terrorist. (RELATED: Trump Should Shutter USAID — Development Economics Is a Hotbed for Corruption)

Musk, to whom everyone is now giving lessons, is the man who has managed to make the most money in the world in recent years. Milei, although he has never stopped being the rock star he was in his youth, has managed to become president of Argentina with a pure libertarian message, in a country where inflation and populism have been the rules of the game for decades. Both hate bureaucracy, both believe in the individual over the state, and both refuse to take for granted that something that doesn’t work should continue, just because “it’s always been done that way.” They are the kind of people I want on my team.

There are those who resent eccentricity and find it frivolous. There have always been boring people. It’s your business whether you prefer a corseted, stiff-as-a-ginger-root gentleman signing expenditure extensions here and there with lots of institutional smiles, or whether you prefer a grumpy madman in sunglasses, whose brain sounds like a 1966 Harley Davidson, setting fire to useless state agencies leaking your money like a shipwrecked sailboat

All is well in this story. The obsessive Musk is going to spend a couple of nights thinking about how to endow the chainsaw with artificial intelligence. Maybe in a few weeks, it will turn itself on in the presence of any Brussels bureaucrat. Milei has thus overshadowed the absurd media spotlight he got into with cryptocurrencies. It’s always advisable not to surround yourself with idiots, rocker! And Tute Di Tella is going to be flooded with orders for custom chainsaws from all over the world. I myself am thinking of ordering one that says “Eternal hatred of the modern world,” or “The stock market or life. IRS,” or “I don’t want to marry Scarlett Johansson anymore”!

In any case, the enthusiastic ovation that CPAC and X have given Musk when he was photographed with his new toy is perhaps not so much in response to his cutback policies, which are already in place, but because they have suddenly solved one of the biggest concerns of the modern era: what the hell do I use as my profile picture on WhatsApp?

READ MORE from Itxu Díaz:

Gay Talese and the Man Who Was Once Bartleby (But He Did It).

JD Vance: An Intelligent Speech for an Artificial Audience

Patriots Summit in Madrid Declares War on Wokeism in the EU

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