Disabled Step-son Taken Advantage Of (financially) By Own Father

My step-son's father is not good with money. I believe he really *DOES* love his son, but the father's own self interest gets in the way. Son's mother (who I married and later divorced) passed away and son got social security from her (until 18) and is also getting disability payments. His mom's estate had money in it from my divorce and Some of this money was kept in a conservatorship. That expired when he turned 18. The father had been using the money for household expenses, including the son's. Maternal grandfather was conservator since father had bankruptcy in the past, When conservatorship expired, father got control of the money in the conservatorship that was the step-son's. The family decided to use it ALL for a family vacation and other expenses. Part of the rationale is that the step son cannot get disability AND have assets.

I am about to give this step son some money that I owe him as part of his mom's estate. its significate. perhaps not life changing but its a good downpayment on a house for many people.

I'm concerned that this money will EFFECTIVELY go to father's benefit. I am quite sure that would not be appropriate use of his mother's legacy . I don't really want to cause the father grief. He's got plenty on his plate. But I don't feel like he is responsible enough to separate his interests from his son's financial future.

I feel like I should establish a trust or an ABLE account. I think the problem there is that I dont have the authority and the father could sue me for the money anyway- AND cost a bunch in legal fees.

Another option I thought of would be to report to the state how the money in the conservatorship was used- And hope the state DHS would/could do something about it. I consider that scorched earth/last resort though. Finally, could I threaten this action and convince father to establish able account?. OR trust?

Thoughts?