I Want To Divorce My Husband But We Have Kids.

Husband (American)and I (European) have been married for 20 years, currently living in Pennsylvania. Due to many unsolvable issues I want to divorce him. I can't believe it's come to this.

If it were just the two of us, it would be easy, I would move back to my home country, start over and that would be it.

But we have two school age kids. I have no steady income (artist), husband is self employed with also no steady income but substantially more than me. We do have assets and are by no means poor.

On paper, what with the kids' stability, established friendships, school etc, they would be better off if they stay with my husband, but he's not an involved dad(one of many issues). He spends about 95% every day behind his computer (50% is work related, the other is hobbies) and they would be miserable without me.

I want out of this marriage and ideally have the kids live with me. I have support in my home country, the kids are bilingual.

I'm not in danger, we are amicable but marriage is dead.

What to do about the kids, what about visitation rights? Will they have to choose? Who will have to pay for flights? Will I loose the kids no matter what unless I stay in the USA?