My (dead) Relative Saddled Me With Legal And Financial Fuckery While I Try To Care For My (not Dead) Grandmother.

My elderly grandmother had a stroke about 2.5 years ago and ended up in a nursing home. Due to her location (Florida) her local relative took on POA duties and worked to establish an Irrevocable Asset Protection Trust so she could qualify for Medicaid. This relative put every cent she had into that trust. I don’t know much about Medicaid or Florida elder law (I am nowhere near Florida) so I just assumed this was the way things were done. Time passed, my grandmother developed dementia, and 3 months ago her relative suddenly died. I was under the impression that I was successor POA and successor trustee. Surprise! I was not. There was no successor. For anything. Bad on me for not being more involved and asking for copies of everything, but it is what it is at this point. I’ve managed to get POA and I just paid an arm and a leg to get documents drawn up to hopefully make me trustee. The more I’m finding out about how things were done, the more concerned I’m getting. It sounds like she’s essentially not allowed to use her money in the trust (which I was planning to use for legal fees and eventual burial costs) and that money will go back to Florida if she dies within 5 years of the trust creation. In a horrible turn or events, she went into the hospital with pneumonia and the outlook is bleak. I don’t know if she has long and she certainly doesn’t have another 2.5 years. Every attorney I’ve tried to talk to acts like I’m a money hungry monster who is committing elder abuse when I ask for help so the obvious next place to go for advice is Reddit. I just want to do right by my grandma and not go completely bankrupt in the process.