Va/funeral Home Lost Documents For Burial

My grandfather died in 2021, the funeral home filed the paperwork for my aunt (who was disabled & taken care of by my grandparents) to be placed in his casket (cremated). Funeral home told us that she is placed in his casket, but can not have a tombstone because there is no documentation that she was disabled & his dependent. her doctors were all dead at the time so we could not provide proof of her disability status.

At his funeral, supposedly my aunt was placed in his casket right before he was put in the ground. After his funeral he was supposed to be done & in the ground by 4pm, he was not in the ground till 6pm that day.

Flash forward to today, my grandmas (his wife) funeral was yesterday. My family was stopped from leaving the service, & guided to the office. We were told that they are not sure if her cremains are in the casket, because she has no tombstone & the VA has no record of her being in the grave. I have proof of the burial permit/adjustment from the funeral home stating that her resting place is in my grandpas casket at the cemetery.

The VA is now saying they will seek approval for burial from DC VA. But the question still remains; is my aunt in his casket, or what did they do with her? The VA said she is likely not in the casket, & exhumation is likely.

This has tore my family apart & everybodies blood pressure is sky high. What can be done? Are there grounds to sue either the va or funeral home? Besides the emotion stress & breach of contract, where is my aunt?

My apologies if this is the wrong sub