Wife Was Raped By A Social Worker

Throwaway account due to the sensitive nature of this post.

My wife of more than 10 years came forward to me and told me she was having an affair. It had been going on for 4 months. We had been having problems, and a friend of mine, a licensed social worker, began counseling her privately. Initially he said he just wanted to be a friend, but he told her to keep their communications private “to avoid hurting anyone.” He helped her deal with some childhood trauma that she honestly needed help with. But within a month he’d started sending suggestive texts to her. Eventually he sent her sexual messages, and she reciprocated. In her words, she totally relied on him by this point, and even though it made her sick to her stomach, she felt like she had to do what he asked. 4 times during the affair she attempted to break it off, and 4 times he’d convince her that they needed each other.

Finally she broke it off permanently, telling him that she was deleting their secret app (he taught her to use WhatsApp to create a private chat that couldn’t be discovered without a passcode, ensuring that I wouldn’t accidentally find it.” He got angry and told her he couldn’t let her go without one more time. She said she didn’t want to, but he grabbed her and pulled her down and undressed her. She told me that after telling him she didn’t want to, she never objected again. But she cried the whole time. He turned her around so he couldn’t see her face. She only told me about the rape this week, and said she was so ashamed that she didn’t fight him off or tell him repeatedly to stop that she couldn’t bring herself to tell me.

I should also say that the affair itself was brought forward to the church we were both a part of, and he has confessed to the affair but not the assault, manipulation, abuse, and rape. So we at least have his admission that the affair happened. My wife also has a history of anxiety and depression, and has been through an outpatient program for suicide. She nearly killed herself about 4 years ago. She almost killed herself again near the end of the affair.

She wants to come forward now with the allegations, but she’s afraid of what he’ll do, and doesn’t want to relive everything, but I’ve encouraged her by telling her there are likely other women, he seems to be very experienced in how to hide his affairs, and that this would protect others from this evil man.

But i honestly have no idea where to start with this. Is there a board you can complain to? Or does she need to file a police report?

I thought this would be as good a place as any to ask for help with this.