Engage Bespoke Spirituality: Reflections From Conversations On Campus

During my master’s in philosophy at the University of Edinburgh, I shared the gospel with students from China, the Czech Republic, Hong Kong, Canada, the Philippines, England, the United States, and, of course, Scotland. The university is a bastion of progressive ideals, student activism, bureaucratic greed, and endemic secularism. By and large, however, I felt welcome in the 400-year-old research institution. The diverse, rigorous academic environment fostered perpetual nerding out over philosophy (sometimes to my wife’s chagrin). Several students became my fast friends over this shared passion.

I often encountered the view of faith sometimes called “bespoke spirituality,” a way of engaging with religion by picking and choosing beliefs and practices that “vibe” with you personally. The students I met were authentically open-minded to Christianity. However, they resisted (or often struggled to understand) the claim that Jesus is the only “way,” “truth,” and “life,” and that “no one comes to the Father except through [him]” (John 14:6).

Bespoke spirituality often gets a bad rap—it’s full of mumbo jumbo, crystals, astrology, and naive optimism. However, my philosophically minded peers always offered careful, considerate reasons for their perspectives. I’ve distilled these conversations into two core observations: intelligent folks (especially young people) hold to bespoke spirituality from pragmatic motivations and on epistemic grounds. These positions, in turn, offer believers a way to engage bespoke spiritualists with the gospel.

Pragmatic Motivations

Worldviews aren’t detached, abstract philosophical positions. Rather, as the name suggests, they provide vision to act in the world. Worldviews are pragmatic means of living based on experience as much as they are consciously decided on. And bespoke spirituality is a sensible, pragmatic position in today’s world.

Consider the effects of globalization and multiculturalism. To socially thrive among family, friends, academic peers, and coworkers, young adults need to skillfully accommodate a wide range of cultures, beliefs, and religious practices. Tolerance is society’s most expedient shared value. It’s a broad and shallow common denominator. You might have a distaste for praying in Latin but tolerate Catholics who do it. You might have a distaste for hijabs but tolerate those who wear them in your workplace. You may have a distaste for witchcraft but join in on a séance for fun as a show of friendship.

The profusion of bespoke spirituality and its various forms and practices prevents young people from emotionally wrestling with contradictions between faiths or unpalatable theological beliefs like divine judgment and hell. Proximity used to suffice to find common worldviews; now, we must learn to live harmoniously with people of radically different faiths.

As a matter of both intellectual and social survival, most young people will judge spiritual claims and religious practices by a tried-and-true criteria: Does it work for me? The example of nutrition parallels nicely. In the face of conflicting dietary opinions, it’s better to make the deciding factor “Does it work for my body?”

The youngest generations are, mostly, not nihilistic. They don’t abandon spirituality altogether, and scant few are hard-nosed atheists. They want to live according to meaningful, idealistic values. Therefore, while arguments, reason, and evidence are significant to them, when it comes to spirituality, they’re concerned with what works for them.

Epistemic Overload

Proximity used to suffice to find common worldviews; now, we must learn to live harmoniously with people of radically different faiths.

The age of the internet and social media also offers epistemic grounds for bespoke spirituality. The chronically online generation must deal with a preposterous amount of raw information and opinions thrust on them. A spiritual seeker on TikTok will come across 20 distinct, articulate spiritual beliefs and another 20 well-presented, aesthetic religious practices in a week. In centuries past, a person might only meet two people in his entire life who had a meaningfully different worldview.

Similarly in the world of nutrition, a young person interested in health might follow two dozen influencers on social media. One expert advises never eating meat; the next expert says only meat. One references a well-cited study; another argues the same study was biased and flawed. Every argument, every reason, every possible piece of evidence finds an opposite and equally convincing case.

Amid this torrent of endless information, the next generation needs a quick, readily available way to filter beliefs. They have neither the time nor the mental capacity to maintain intellectual consistency. So they appeal to a combination of affect and intuition. Bespoke spirituality draws a boundary around itself that allows spiritual practices and beliefs in if they pass a “vibe check” and is comfortable with a metamodern approach that embraces conflicting viewpoints.

While past generations would rely on authority and proximity to filter their views, young generations find solace in neither. They’re exceptionally cynical about authority and institutions of all kinds and are exposed to every view under the sun.

Where does this leave Christians trying to reach out to bespoke spiritualists?

Focus on Friendship and Openness

First, we must recover the necessity of embodied friendship. Bespoke spiritualists hold to their convictions, in part, due to their prioritization of relationships. Paradoxically, genuine, embodied friendships are rare in the chronically online generation. Adding one’s voice to the cacophony of detached, decontextualized internet perspectives doesn’t hurt, but it also probably won’t stand out. As such, Christians should focus on doing what we’ve always done: being the hands and feet of Christ, actively living out his love toward our friends, coworkers, and family. In doing so, living as embodiments of Christ’s love becomes a vital foundation for evangelism.

Second, notice the openness of bespoke spiritualists. While some young people buy into the moralistic thinking of contemporary progressives, in my experience, many mature bespoke spiritualists find themselves open to trying out new spiritual practices. From their perspective, they stand in line at the buffet of spirituality, and you suggest they try out your favorite food. Why not; what do they have to lose? Sociological evidence bears this out. Young non-Christians in the United States are surprisingly willing to try church. Gen Z is also far more open to spiritual conversations than previous generations.

As such, the landscape of the post-Christian West either rejects Christianity out of hand due to its image as intolerant or irrelevant, or sees it as one equal expression among near-infinite views. To guide bespoke spiritualists to the living water, we must lead them with compassion and embodied love. Let them see the community of the church, a small pocket of the kingdom of heaven on earth.

But, of course, the thorniest bit of evangelism, which cannot be compromised, comes next.

The Stumbling Block of Truth

The greatest stumbling block and source of confusion for bespoke spiritualists is the Christian understanding of truth. We need not subscribe to simplistic views of truth as “whatever is logical,” that Christians must be purely “rational,” or that truth is “objective.” Instead, Jesus claims to represent truth: “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the father except through me” (John 14:6). Bespoke spiritualists are asking, perhaps wearily, genuinely, or cynically, alongside Pilate, “What is truth?” We must be ready to give them a sincere, transparent answer.

We can’t rely on abstract arguments and our intellect to reason our way to God. Instead, God must reach out and choose us in a profound and mysterious way.

Christianity provides a refreshing, coherent view of truth: it is unified in God’s being—his love, grace, power, and perfection. It is also expressed in a person who possesses immeasurable wisdom for all his followers who ask for it in faith. We can find no deceit in Jesus, who acts as our solid foundation for eternal life, love, hope, and wisdom (1 Pe. 2:22).

No religion, spiritual practice, meditation, philosophy, or aesthetic way of being can supplant the truth that Jesus is the only, exclusive path to God. In bespoke spirituality and metamodernism, the youngest generation is “tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine” (Eph. 4:14).

Because of his claim on truth, Jesus will be a stumbling block to many in this generation, but let’s not add extra, unnecessary offense—Jesus’ radical offer of undeserved grace is offensive enough. Though the truth may appear restrictive to bespoke spiritualists, this truth can set them free, as it has us (John 8:32).